Michaela Cole: 4 lessons on authenticity

Carly
Apr 18
4 min read

Updated: Apr 22

Connection Mentors

The Connection Mentors Series

Healthy relationships are the foundation of well-being, but the strength of our connection to our authentic self creates the blueprint for how we show up in relationships with others. It takes courage to walk the path of authenticity.

This series celebrates the stories of those who live on their terms, honoring their truth, authentic strengths, and deepest desires. Embracing our unique expression as human beings creates a meaningful and impactful life.

May this series inspire you to step closer to your truth or surrender fully to the wisdom of your inner knowing.

Connection Mentor: Michaela Cole

"To truly understand others, we must first understand ourselves".— Michaela Cole

Michaela-Moses Ewuraba O. Boakye-Collinson, aka Michaela Coel, was born in London, England, on October 1, 1987. She was raised by her Ghanaian mother on estates in Hackney and Tower Hamlets. Her career took off with her one-woman show Chewing Gum Dreams, which was later adapted into the hit TV series Chewing Gum, a comedic take on her upbringing in East London. During her school years, Michaela endured racial abuse and was teased for her prominent features, like her full lips. But in the end, she got the last laugh, going from being mocked for her looks to gracing the covers of British GQ and Vogue.

Here are four powerful lessons on authenticity from the life of Michaela Cole.

Get in where you fit in.
Michaela spent much of her youth feeling lost, unsure of what she wanted for her future. For five years, she became a devout Christian at the age of 17, and it was during this period, through reading the Bible and having a profound experience with the presence of God, that she began writing poetry. Reading Psalms inspired her to write a poem called God’s Next Top Model, about the concept that everyone is unique and beautifully created. After performing one of her poems at a Christian pub, someone invited her to read poems elsewhere. A director encouraged her to take up acting. University never really sparked her interest, and it didn’t quite work for her—she attempted it twice before ultimately dropping out for good. Instead, she poured herself into writing and performing, eventually enrolling in drama school after being encouraged by a mentor.
Create from a place of truth and be the voice for the misfits who go unseen and unheard.
Toward the end of drama school, Michaela finally landed a lead role in a school play. While ecstatic about the opportunity, she also felt a deep desire to create something that authentically represented people who looked like her and shared a similar working-class upbringing. That desire led her to write and perform a one-woman show, Chewing Gum Dreams, which she performed at the Bush Theatre and the National Theatre of Great Britain. Along the way, she met someone who saw its potential as a television series, which eventually became Chewing Gum. Like the play, the show chronicled the lives of the diverse families Michaela grew up around on her estate. It follows a young Michaela as she navigates self-discovery and identity in early adulthood. Michaela often describes herself and those she grew up with as “misfits”—people society tends to overlook or render invisible.
Choose happiness and meaning over fame.
As Michaela's star continues to rise with her notoriety, she remains grounded and has no desire to reach a level of fame that feels overexposed. She prioritizes happiness and privacy over the spotlight. Michaela has mentioned that she’s willing to reveal more about herself or step further into the public eye only when there’s an important or impactful message to share. Her love for the craft of writing and acting far outweighs any desire for designer clothes, mansions, or widespread fame. This intentionality gives her the freedom to stay confident in her self-perception and the belief that she already has everything she needs to do what she loves.
Use your craft to metabolize and share difficult truths, so others with similar experiences feel seen and understood.
In interviews, Michaela Coel speaks eloquently and empathetically about the complexities of being human. She courageously shared her personal experience with sexual assault through her semi-autobiographical series I May Destroy You. The main character, Arabella—a writer—navigates the aftermath of sexual assault after her drink is spiked during a work break. Michaela used the film to spark urgent conversations about the importance of systems meant to support survivors. She also shared that the project became a mirror, helping her confront the parts of herself that weren’t always kind or perfect. Through Arabella’s journey, Michaela invites us to embrace ourselves and others as whole, flawed, messy, resilient, and deeply human—even in the wake of trauma.

The journey to self-discovery can be messy and challenging. When we relinquish control and give ourselves permission to honor our curiosity with "yes," each new experience provides us with insights. The more insights and knowledge we gather, the more our intuition strengthens, and the more likely we are to honor our authentic desires.